Here is another cool question from yahoo answers. Check it out and see if it resonates with you.
I just want to get some opinions from women who don’t have children & what they think about dating men with a kid/s.
From personal experience it was a draining two years of my life. The problem wasn’t so much the 2 children but having to deal with baby mama drama tore our relationship apart. Of course there were times when the kids seemed like an interference on our dating life, & their dad sometimes asking me to take to much responsibility for them, but nevertheless I don’t want to ever date a man with kids again.Childless,Single Ladies what’s your opinion?
My quick answer to this question:
My opinion… is that… YOU HAVEN’T TAKE MY QUIZ, YOU DONT GET IT… Lol… It wasn’t really the kids. The kids were simply an… “accelerator”. The kids simply allowed you to see how incompatible you two are faster. If you’re someone you really click with and on the same wavelength, those things tend to find ways to sort themselves out. So my recommendation is: Don’t go making a “won’t date dads from now on” sort of a rule in your head. If its not the kids, it’ll be football, or his hobbies or his career.
Those are simply parts of his life. When you two match, those parts don’t come in between, but are enriching. I think that makes sense, no?
But really dude there's no reason you should be confused about any of this. If you haven't taken the quiz to see how you stack up with women yet... Click here and see what your results are on the personal dating quiz.
{ 5 comments… read them below or add one }
I’m childfree by choice, but as we get older (late 20s, 30s, 40s, etc) it is more and more common for the people we meet to date, to have children. At my age (44 today) it’s more common for guys I meet to have kids than not, but also they are often grown kids (not always).
I’ve dated guys with younger kids before, but the relationships didn’t tend to last too long (not because of the kids). My current lover has a grown daughter that lives in another state, so that won’t be an issue if things turn serious for us (*crosses fingers it does*). ☺♥☻
Kids are just one of the issues that many older single people have to deal with…either your own or someone elses.
I am a man and feel exactly the same about dating women with kids. Been there, Done that, It Sucks! You will always be second third or fourth in line behind the kids and maybe mama drama as well. It is not fair when you are willing to make the other person a priority but they are not willing to make you a priority. You have the right idea, find someone without kids. Hope you don’t mind me answering.
Same here! I do not want to date a man with kids because I take care of them all day! I like being able to give them back at the end of the day, not coming home to more kids. And it’s selfish of other men to expect me to be the mother figure of someone else’s child. I want my own kids, not someone else’s. And from experience of taking care of kids, most of the time the kids do not get along with the new female in the house…let alone that new female has kids. It’s just NEVER as easy as you think it can be in your mind. Which is why I try to stay away from men with kids. I just can’t put up with it.
I live with a man with 2 kids. What he doesn’t understand is if I don’t want my own kids why should I want anyone else’s!!?? I know he comes with kids and I have to accept that BUT he won’t accept that it cuts both ways. I DON’T come with kids and he has to accept that. So when I go out to avoid them when they come to my home (yes, I feel driven out of my own home by his ex’s offspring!) he get the hump. I’m not stopping him seeing them but I just don’t have an maternal ‘off/on’ switch for his past choices to reproduce. I simply don’t find kids cute. What’s the crime in that!!?? I’m not a monster I just can’t go ‘aw’ when I see a kid. They leave me cold and I can’t change that. So yes I accept his kids but my problem is he can’t accept that a woman can feel the way I do.
Then there’s the ex factor – living in her shaddow. Reminder of the afct that they had sex because the proof comes over every week. Yet I have a male friend he is very jealous of. He hates me seeing him so much I have to hide it from him. He said ‘I don’t want him in my face’ yet I have his ex in mine!!!
I can’t see this relationship lasting for ever. I can’t live like this for much longer. Parents are very precious over what they have produce and if you are a parent reading this you will never understand where I am coming from. You will never understand how awful it is to put up with another woman’s child when you are in love with the father. YOU have the status of ‘mother of his children’.
But men like dating childfree women because we give our time to the relationship. We don’t get bogged down with putting the kids first. So we do have an advatage. We can have sex when and where ever we want without fear of being disturbed. In fact we still want to have sex full stop! Hahahaha! So remember childfree ladies, the ex will have the status, the brats will come first but we have the power!
I am child-free and I absolutely refuse to date a man with offspring. I like my life as it is, don’t have the patience to deal with kids, and refuse to come second to anyone in my relationship with my guy, just as he would never come second in my life.
@childfreeandhappy
I really pity you, and I have to disagree with you that childfree women dating childfree men have the power. Actually, the mother of his children has the power. She has been able to dictate the allocation of your resources (time, money, energy, your boyfriend) to how she sees fit…even if it’s only by accident. I do however, agree with you on one point: Men with kids tend to love dating a child-free woman because they know that she can devote her resources to the relationship.